With or Without You
by Brown-Eyes1
Summary: Obi Wan broods after finding out Padme and Anakin have been married. A sad Obidala fic. Post AOTC, AU.


With or Without You  
  
By: Brown-Eyes  
  
Disclaimer: I'm not GL so they aren't mine, but I am saving up for an Obi! I also don't own the beautiful song "With or Without You" by U2.  
  
Summary: Obi Wan broods after finding out Padme and Anakin have been married. A sad Obidala fic. Post AOTC, AU.  
  
Note: Following the trend of my other Obidala fictions, lets just say that Obi and Padme have had a secret romantic relationship like we all know they should.  
  
  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
See the stone set in your eyes  
  
See the thorn twist in your side  
  
I wait for you  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
  
  
The cool nighttime breeze trickled around Obi Wan has he watched the bustling city below the balcony. Speeder buzzed, neon signs danced within the darkness, the roar of creatures and humans echoed from below. Coruscant was alive tonight...  
  
Unlike Obi Wan.  
  
He was dead...or at least his heart was...  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Sleight of hand and twist of fate  
  
On a bed of nails she makes me wait  
  
And I wait without you  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Taking a swig of the sour liquor he griped tightly in his hand, Obi Wan tried to drown the sobs of a his broken heart...dull the wounds of truth. But it didn't matter how much he drank it couldn't take away the pain. Sweet intoxication would never be able to erase the harsh reality.  
  
Erase the fact that Padme had married Anakin.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
With or without you  
  
With or without you  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Looking out into the great beyond, the Master recalled his padawan's jovial smile as he told him that they had secretly married on Naboo. The way his eyes shone with pure bliss as he proclaimed that his life was now complete that Padme was his wife.  
  
And as Obi Wan watched Anakin glow with such pride, all he could do was shove down the wails of his aching heart. Try to ignore his own suffering and try to smile for his apprentice. Try to congratulate him for marrying the woman he loved, and who loved him back.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Through the storm we reach the shore  
  
You give it all but I want more  
  
And I'm waiting for you  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
It wasn't like Obi Wan had known it would happen. He had always known he could never have Padme. Anakin had always adored her and he was forbidden to love.  
  
But every since that stolen kiss years before, he found himself helplessly and deeply in love with the Senator. Unable to hide his feelings for her the Jedi Knight found himself sharing a secret love affair with Padme, full of love and passion he had never known possible. And for the first time in his whole existence, Obi Wan knew what true happiness was when he held his Padme in his arms.  
  
But that was all over now...she wasn't his anymore Padme. In fact she had never been his Padme to begin with; he had only gotten to pretend for a little while.  
  
And that horrible truth rubbed more salt into the open scars of his already dying heart.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
With or without you  
  
With or without you  
  
I can't live  
  
With or without you  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Closing his eyes and letting the alcohol burn is lips; Obi Wan let himself savor the sorrow that loomed above him. Let the pain cut him deeply so he could never forget what he would always desire but never have. Padme-  
  
Before Obi Wan could pursue his wallowing any further, the light treaded of delicate footsteps approaching from behind cut him off. Once more his angel...his siren...his Padme had come to him in the darkness of night.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
And you give yourself away  
  
And you give yourself away  
  
And you give  
  
And you give  
  
And you give yourself away  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Here comes the bride..." Obi Wan spat, his voice full of pain and drunkenness as he continued to stare at the Coruscant night life below.  
  
"I'm sorry Ben, I'm so sorry." Padme stated weakly she took her place beside him on the balcony. "I was going to tell you...only Ani got to you first..." Slowly she lifted her fingers to his cheek, but Obi Wan only shuttered and moved away.  
  
"Go away Padme. I want to be alone." He commanded coolly, still refusing to look at her. Lifting the bottle to his lips he drank more, hoping that for once it would dull his pain.  
  
Ignoring his command Padme went on her voice becoming dark, "Your drunk Ben."  
  
"And so what if I am?" Obi Wan snorted, his stormy blue-gray orbs transfixed somewhere off in the distance, "It's not like you're my wife."  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
My hands are tied  
  
My body bruised, she's got me with  
  
Nothing to win and  
  
Nothing left to lose  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Why do you have to be so cruel Ben. You know I didn't want to marry Ani...you know what he would do if I tried refused him..." She whispered in a forlorn voice, tears flowing freely from her big brown eyes, "And you know your the one I love..."  
  
Slowly Obi Wan turned to see Padme; her sweet eyes wearing with the same misery that lingered in his. Looking at her in that state made all the downing the liquor had done useless and the aching of his heart more intense. Going against his better judgment he found his feet along with his heart carry him to her.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
And you give yourself away  
  
And you give yourself away  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
"I know Padme, I know. We both can't hurt him...even if it means causing ourselves heartache," He replied sadly cupping her porcelain face in his hand, "But we'll always love each other."  
  
"Yes...we'll always have each other." Padme said putting on a smile, "Always have each other."  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
And you give  
  
And you give  
  
And you give yourself away  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Wrapping one another in an embrace the two stood there for a long moment, not a word said. Finally breaking the peace, Padme sadly whispered into his ear, "I can't live with or without you Ben..."  
  
"And I can't live either Padme, I simply can't," He uttered softly leaning down letting his lips tenderly capture hers.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
With or without you  
  
With or without you  
  
I can't live  
  
With or without you  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Padme!" Anakin's voice yelled from deep inside the apartments in search of her, "Where are you!?" Immediately the two reluctantly broke apart from the kiss at the sound of Anakin's voice.  
  
"Anakin..." Padme's voice trailed off weakly at the thought of leaving her Ben.  
  
"I know..." He replied then kissed her forehead, "I know." Then without another hesitation he let Padme go from the embrace. Turning she left her love for duty.  
  
"With or without," Obi Wan cried softly into the wind as watched her walk away from him and back into the arms of Anakin. "I can't live with or without you..."  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
With or without you  
  
With or without you  
  
I can't live  
  
With or without you  
  
With or without you  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
I hope you guys enjoyed it. I think the U2 song fit perfectly with the Obi/Ami angst fic! Please review! They make me so happy!  
  
The next chapter of "Sweet Sorrows" will be up soon!  
  
I really can't stand the Ani/Ami love in AOTC! It is way too melodramatic! Two things run through my mind when I am watching them together:  
  
-When is Obi going to get Anakin out of the way and show how to really romance a girl  
  
-What happened to the simply days of a Star Wars romance. When Leia called out "I love you" and Han simply replied "I know." Does anyone else other than me miss that? 


End file.
